Fear of Falling: Skating and Thoughts on Exercise

Me as a tennis player, back in the times of yore.

This weekend, I start going to the Gotham Girls Rec League Level 1 for beginning skaters. I'm extremely excited - but also very nervous! I have been skating sporadically throughout the summer, but this is the time where I will be getting back to it in earnest. I am happy to say that I am getting better and better each time I get back on, but I still have a knee-jerk reaction to hold back when I start going "too fast" or feel myself toppling over. Perhaps this is the common fate of humankind (Thou shalt not roll on wheels as a form of locomotion), but I have seen so many brilliant players that do it effortlessly that I can't help but feel envious.

On a similar note of self-reflection, I have realized that I was at one point accustomed to getting 2 hours of exercise 5 days a week for at least half the year. It was a realization that made me go "whoa" aloud in my bedroom at 1am. I used to be a tennis player who, while not very good, really enjoyed the game and the exercise involved in it.

I completely forfeited that when I came to college.

And I've come to realize that exercise and movement is actually something I really need to be consistently happy. Perhaps because I was getting that throughout high school, I grew accustomed to it and felt that it was an integral part of my life. But now, when the choice is sleeping a little longer or getting in an hour of exercise, I choose to hit the snooze button.

College may give me a lot of choices in lifestyle, but it binds with the same force. With the pressure of classes, homework, my job, and my internship all going down at once, I really have to carve out the hours for everything else - from art to exercise, they get pushed off to the side.

I am seeing how important it is to make that time happen. Skating for 2 hours every week will be just one of my first steps.

Interested to read more about roller derby? Read my post about How Roller Derby Challenges Stereotypes of Women in Sports.

Work Week

I have long since given up my maxim "never start a book at night."
There are just so many books to read! Both for class and for pleasure, late into the night we are glued to the pages of text. But that makes me feel great sometimes because it is an accomplishment to finish each little stretch of reading - it's probably something I'll never have to do again after my college years. Anyway...
This week, I embarked on the first week of my new job! I got a job in the mail room and it's pretty good so far. I also got a second job at the library, which is ideal for me, being a book nerd as mentioned above. Now I can actually afford to eat meals! I can't wait till I can finally pay my dad back something... but my goal right now is to just make sure that my expenses at the end of the month add up to the amount I make from these two jobs. We'll see how it goes.
I have been starting to work out when I get stressed or unable to do schoolwork any longer. I literally skid out of my Decolonization class thinking "I need to go swimming." At least it's something that's good for my body but, as I've been saying literally every time I get out of the pool, I feel like an old person. I just haven't worked out in a long while and it's taking some time for my body to adjust; not to the soreness, but just to the regular exercise. Hopefully that changes when I get massively toned abs and arms (ha, not). It's another one of my gentle introduction things - so far it is paying off.
I sense that the weeks to come will be more interesting than the weeks that have passed; I have been carrying all these grand ideas in my head lately but haven't been able yet to write them down, so I think my next gentle introduction will be into writing a little on the weekends so that it comes out (yay, fiction class!) as well as going to a lot of campus events again. It's just been too cold to do anything else. There is no snow, even though they said there was going to be a lot but the wind has been bone-chilling so I have just been waiting it out in my dorm room, venturing out into the world only to eat, work, go to class, and exercise. Hmm, that should probably change.

Memoirs of the Worst Dancer in the World

Gah! I feel like the worst dancer in the world. Maybe because I learned the dance last week, I can use that as an excuse for my failure, but I messed up so much during the try-out today. We got in, because everyone 'got in' but I just felt like a loser and started asking people if we did well or not. Most of them said that I didn't do well or that people were freaked out about random people dancing to a Japanese anime song (which angered me, if you don't want to watch, don't comment!)
But, this was just the try-outs. I have to remember that there is 2 weeks until the actual performance and I am just going to work on Hare Hare Yukai some more in that time.
Enough about that.
For now, we have a long weekend, so I am going to catch up on some BIG HUGE assignments and then give myself some time to goof off. We are finally done with all the tests, but there are still 4-5 weeks till the end of school [liberation!] so there are many projects and essays. Ah well, there is fun stuff in between.
As of the moment, I am doing well with working out by taking Step classes, going to the gym and doing stuff with the trainer. Tomorrow I get to hear her first comments on my food journal, and hopefully I'll be able to change my habits... >.> However, I'm slightly scared considering I overheard her yelling at a guy ["FIFTY-SEVEN GRAMS OF SUGAR!" o_o]
Other than that, for now it must seem that I have a really boring life. It's probably true. However, I am quite content to end out the year with a hectic/crazy/boring life [contradictory, no?] And then it's off to NYC! *stars glitter in eyes*

Expelliarmus (And Other Weird Spells We Still Remember)

I may be crazy, but I guess some things happen for a reason.
Yesterday was a medley of celebration and fear as we sashayed about town to commemorate the sun's awakening, our upcoming Hare Hare Yukai performance, and some general life demands. Instead of working hard, I flounced about and tried to have some fun for once. Today was the same, except with a bit more work and a little more personal benefit. Walk for Aidan was quite awesome, and then I went to the trainer and hauled ass (literally, we worked on glutes today) as beginning my exercise/dietary goals. Then afterward I dozed and felt horrible for a few hours and finally decided to go to The Hairy Baby and loved to watch the strangeness and the common themes that flitted through a surrealistic setting [also, I love Monster - he sculpts busts! (again, literally)]
Now I'm sitting at home thinking that I should be able to devote 2 hours to myself every day. One for general exercise and well-being, the other for writing and creative thought. Just because... I think I've let my life go to other people or other commitments too much [I would say lately, but it's really been all year] And so I'm going to start working on myself again, because (as my trainer would say) I've 'fallen off the wagon' in terms of appreciating the fact that I'm an 'artist' and a human being. I'm going to have to push to the end of the year in some things, but I can't believe how much time I spend sitting around thinking to do something and then either being too scared or too stressed to do it. It's something I really need to get rid of - hesitation.
And thus, with that effervescent glow about me, I'm going to retire to my bed. Goodnight.