Project x Project: Playing Catch Up

Today I worked on just about everything but NaNo, which I told myself that I was going to catch up on completely. I did not write one word all weekend and, as a consequence, have to write 6107 words at least by tonight's end to be on track. I think I can do it, but that word count on paper just seems like a really daunting task.
Which means that I'm going to talk about confidence building and what that means in a project.

I sometimes get nervous about big projects. I feel like I don't have enough a. resources, b. stamina, c. intellect, or d. time to do any of it. And sometimes I don't even get off the starting blocks because of this mindset. But, to take a lesson from the SOCLR leadership handbook, I believe that Vision and Passion are the two most important things that a leader needs to have. And thus, to be a leader, I have to follow through regardless of the other things I may lack. I have to tell myself that they will come up along the way if I keep working.
That is my first piece of advice: just keep working. NaNo has taught me that, if you get discouraged, you just need to write through it. You just need to push on because there is always time for revision - in December. And nothing builds confidence as much as having a large body of work under your belt, even if it's far from perfect.

My second piece of advice pertains to an organizer's nightmare: juggling commitments. What happens when you're writing a paper, working two jobs, working on a novel, writing grant proposals, and trying to get a decent amount of sleep all at the same time? Chaos, obviously.
But I think that the chaos can be cut down if you work on prioritization. If you need a day for yourself, take it. If you need a few extra hours of sleep, go for it, so long as whatever you're working on is not too time sensitive. I think the point is to take care of yourself before any of the fabulous projects you're working on. You are not your projects, and you will have as much time as you need.

Finally, in pursuing all of your visions, somewhere along the line your passion may dwindle out. I am guilty of this, guilty of giving up in the face of the obstacles that I see in my way. But I think that, instead of putting down the burden when working on a tough project, it might just need to be re-framed.
I have experimented with this idea when it comes to work. Sometimes I just don't want to go into the office or do some other commitment - but, if I think about it in a positive light, it helps me get through. Now, I'm not going to lie, it doesn't make the experience completely enjoyable all the time, but at least it can keep you going while you are recuperating from the passion doldrums. The next time you have to do a difficult task, try to find the positive things that make it worthwhile: for instance, although it might be isolating in the library, at least you get to read something good for a while! Or, at least, hopefully.

Alright, now I'm on to my 6107 for tonight. Wish me luck!

On Location: SOCLR Love (or, Day 3)

(my SOCLR graphic - click to actually read!)

I want to describe my SOCLR experience in a series of experiences, similar to the way I have previously described New York.

1. First day, waiting for the bus, lugging too much stuff, I am aided by a kind (and stronger) hand.
2. I almost cry on multiple occasions from day one to day three.
3. Fig leaf shed; real life coming.
4. Four words: rock, paper, scissors tournament.
5. Interesting insightful conversation even between programs - after an interview, before eating, on the bus...
6. Trippiest and most educational game ever: forks, spoons, knives.
7. Beware the Facebook profile.
8. Working on the intersectionality of identities and how that affects your leadership.
9. Following through on your goals.
10. I met some of the most fantastic people and I have never felt as safe at college than at this retreat.

Thank you so much everyone for the notes, for the support, for the greatness that is SOCLR. Leadership is a promise made in your heart and your head to your peers, and I believe that it comes from all good intentions. Our experiences at SOCLR really voiced our good will and good intentions, which I hope will blossom into greater leadership on campus and a safe community in which people can be as open as possible without fear.

Read the first two posts SOCLR Day 1 and SOCLR Day 2.

On Location: SOCLR Day 2

It occurred to me that anyone outside of the Columbia community (or even most people in the Columbia community) probably don't know what SOCLR is. Allow me to define:
SOCLR = Students of Color Leadership Retreat, which is put on every year to discuss and challenge stereotypes and other racial issues that pertain to personal identity and society at large. This year, we are working towards the idea of leadership, not just for racial issues, but also for all our other interests and identities.
This weekend is all about connecting with a group that you may not have run across on campus and may not necessarily have thought to talk to. We have discussed issues on the intersections between multiple identities, shared personal stories about the hardships of our lives, and laughed until we all felt united in a special and intense way. Basically, my recommendation to anyone and everyone is to go on a retreat (if you have the chance) because you will learn about yourself and you will make connections.
I will have a more comprehensive recap once we get back to campus and have internet and other technological phenomenons, but just know that so far it has been intense and great.

However, I have not been on schedule for my novel this weekend - there's just a lot of other stuff to do!
18,898 words.

Read the first post SOCLR Day 1 and follow-upSOCLR Love.

On Location: SOCLR Day 1

Today I am embarking on a restorative weekend. No cell phone reception, select internet, and a completely different location than my urban Manhattan lifestyle. (I know, quel horreur!)
So, for this weekend, I will probably be putting up posts that are more descriptive than analytical, but we'll see how it goes. Let's get on to the day:

- In the morning, I overpacked my bag with all the things a city girl thinks she'll need at a camp site and almost broke my shoulder hiking it up to Wallach...
- The group trickled in slowly but surely, pizza was served (breakfast of champions)
- We participated in some getting-to-know-you exercises - human bingo reminded me of fourth grade a little bit (for those of you who don't know, you have to find a person that matches the boxes in the room)
- We got on the bus and watched Kick Ass, an enthralling but HORRIBLE movie
- 3 hours, winding roads, deer, cows and some greenery later... we arrived at Frost Valley YMCA!
- It gets dark out here super fast, so we hiked up to our camp building, a great place named Quirk (haha)
- We had our "official opening" and shared some personal fig leaves (a.k.a. where our defenses lie)

Conclusion of the day? I think I'm going to like it here...

Read the follow-up posts SOCLR Day 2 and SOCLR Love.