Saturday, October 4, 2008

As I have said multiple times before: I want college.
Maybe if I say it enough times it'll come faster. However, in the present moment the first few weeks of high school have petered into nearly a month of the same scholastic opportunities as last year. I am feeling less stressed but also more bored as it pumps along. I feel like my whole life is spent doing homework [either getting it ahead of time or getting it on time or trying to study for something...] or counting the amount of hours that I sleep or regretting the fact that I didn't write or make time for myself today. I am sure that I am gaining weight because when I get home I'm hungry and I grab whatever is there, and I am also conflicted on whether I sleep too little or too much [because sometimes I get to bed at a reasonable hour and other times I take too many naps.] I don't know why these things worry me, but I guess that the lack of balance is throwing me off. I don't have time to run to the gym [nor do I have a car right now...] and I am trying to work as hard as I can on everything and yet still make time for me. Curse the problems of living life.
In general, I am pretty happy. Get to go to my clubs, football games, make a fool of myself... the average stuff. I just wish that I had my full freedoms and liberties allotted to me. Not even outlandish things either - I want stuff like: choosing what time I eat lunch, being able to go out late on weeknights, and seeing my friends on weekends [they never have time because they're slaves to the homework/good grades/responsibility machine - is no one ever spontaneous anymore?] Luckily, I am going to be taking a class at Hugo House soon and I think things will even out by then.
If they don't... spontaneous combustion time.